Is it possible to miss something that isn't gone yet...? Can one's heart hurt long before it is actually broken? Well, yes..I think it is and I think it can...I feel a sense of loss, of heartache, of loneliness...yet I am not alone, my heart has not been broken...but I sense it coming..I can feel it in my very soul. I'm not sure when, or who will break it, but I know it is going to happen. When I say who, it may well be me..I have been walking a narrow path recently trying not to stray, not to crush what is on either side, trying to keep it all good...but it does not seem to matter, I still stumble into the wrong place, or step on something I shouldn't, sometimes I don't even know what I've done, but it seems to be wrong. The intimacy that should be a given, is gone..in its place is uncertainty, confusion, and hurt. When I am sad there is no comfort, no sympathy, no understanding. I feel so cold all of the time. Who will break my heart? It might have to be me...because the thought of going on like this is too much to bear...I am missing something that is still here....but truthfully..left a long time ago. The time is coming to let it go.....
